Tuesday, 9 August 2011

Divorce Side effects

A person's belief on love ends after divorce. It is a stoppage in an individual's love life and along with it, brings a  versatile side effects that affect a person emotionally as well as mentally and make him/her weak and down, deprives him/her of concentration on work and career.

The Effects of Divorce on Children – What to Expect
When you first “break the news” to your child, their initial reaction might vary from extreme anger, to sadness, to drawing an immediate conclusion that their parents’ breakup is their fault. One of the most damaging effects of divorce on children is the different “outlets” they turn to in an effort to deal with their hurt and pain.
Unfortunately, one of these “outlets” is…drugs.
Kids use drugs to cover up the emotional pain they’re feeling as a result of the troubling events that led to the divorce. This often leads to poor grades in school and even can result in the child dropping out of school completely.
But aside from those “physical” effects of divorce, there are many damaging emotional side effects that your children will carry with them for the rest of their lives. For instance, studies have proven that one of the most common emotional effects of divorce on children has been low self-esteem.
This lack of self-esteem carries into their adult lives and leads to many unpleasant side effects like troubled relationships, difficulties finding a job and marital troubles.

Other effects of divorce on children include:
  • self-blame or guilt; feeling responsible for parental problems
  • alcohol use, or other self-destructive behavior
  • feelings of abandonment
  • sadness, and even suicidal thoughts or behavior
  • withdrawal from family, friends, and/or activities
  • anger (at self and others), rage or even violent behavior
  • acting out, defiance and limit-testing behavior
  • sexual activity
  • Divorce, disease and death    Divorce is painful for both the partners if both of them started with the promise to remain together in life. Some of the mental health indicators affected by divorce include  depression, hostility, self-acceptance, personal growth and positive relations with others. divorced people show higher rates of emotional disturbance, accidental death and death from heart disease, cancer, high blood pressure and damage of the liver. These deaths could be related to psychological functioning as divorce required a profound readjustment.
  • Anger and blood pressure     Some people harbor anger even after divorce, it is usually much harder for such people to accept the reality that the  relationship has come to an end. In the course of normal conversation, a person’s blood pressure can rise dramatically. However, the rise is minimal when people are talking to their pets, spouses or close friends.

There’s evidence that divorce can also become an all-engulfing stress for many, even if they are getting divorced for the right reasons. There’s a need for internal and external reorganization after a divorce. The effects are not just short-term. Even after many years divorced people have trouble reconnecting with the opposite sex.

Women are stressed before divorce because of financial and social reason but men are stressed after divorce because they have to take care of so many things which they never had to deal with in the past. Those who form new intimate relationships soon after divorce are most likely to recover from divorce sooner than the others who remained unmarried.

Divorce, anxiety and parenthood
Rates of car accidents, alcoholism, drug abuse, depression and anxiety increase among men who remained single after divorce for a longer period. However, divorced mothers who must deal with such added stresses as poverty, continued conflicts with their former husbands or problems in child-rearing also face long-term risks to their emotional health. Divorced mothers of teen-age sons have an especially hard time, she and others have found, but mothers of very young  children usually have difficulties too, particularly if they do not have outside jobs.

Contact with children
It’s hard raising kids alone. Soon after divorce parenting breaks down and becomes inconsistent and punitive. Children can complicate the lives of the divorced but their presence can also reduce the suicide potential of the parents.
Contact with ex-partner
The ”bonds of attachment” between former spouses last much longer than either of them would have expected, even for the one who most wanted the divorce. Divorced spouses often continue to be valuable resources for one another. When there is a moderate amount of contact between the spouses emotional disturbance are less.
Social Circle
Lack of friends or social contacts is associated with anxiety and depression among the divorced and seemed to be especially important in the longer run.

If love and marriage has a feeling like heaven, DIVORCE brings a feel of hell.. 

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